Category: The Trojan Horse

(br) – In an interview with our respectable newspaper, our glorious President Donald J. Trump put the ravaging Germans back into their place. “It doesn’t appear to be a strategy to my cabinet; it seems that they are just doing something, because they are so embarrassed by their absence of strategy.” Commenting on the US presence in the Philippines, Mr. Trump told our very reliant newspaper, that the US were always there on the invitation of the Philippine government and stated that if the German government, “which is in dismay anyway” wants to leave the war on terrorist groups to the worlds, it’s fine, “we don´t need them.” Mr. Trump sadly could not comment on the allegations, that Germany may have interfered with the American plane misconducting an airstrike meant to hit MAUTE, but he instead called out liberal whistle-blowers in the intelligence community by labeling them as “unpatriotic”. When asked about the support of the other NATO partners for the US, he told our great newspaper, that “the US are not dependent on anyone, anyone is depending on the US.”  Military action is not planned, as the Germans are just acting “pathetic”.

(cb) – Is China the real mastermind behind the recent terrorist attacks? This newspaper received confidential information from an anonymous source that accused China to work together with the Philippine terrorist group Maute.  In contrast to Maute, China would be able to get access to protected servers that caused the terrible tragedies in Syria, Luxembourg and Germany. The anonymous source additionally warned that China might send a Trojan horse to German and US government servers.

(cb) – In absolute contrast to German punctuality, the German foreign minister was the only one being late at the meeting. “People are late, it’s a crisis”, the Philippine representative groaned immediately. What could be more important than a meeting between the defence and foreign ministers in an international cyber crisis? Was he trapped in a revolving door like it happened to a Chinese delegate a few days ago. The Chinese delegate got released after 26 hours trapped in the revolving door. He currently stays in the hospital but will soon get out.

Finally, the German foreign minister appeared with a Red Bull in hand insulting the journalists: “You want to take a fucking picture?” Is this the new tone practiced in Germany?

(pp) – An interview with German minister of defence has sparked outrage. Being unwilling to comment on the purpose of the recent re-enactment of military service, she suggested that a German military operation is imminent, in reaction to whatever “crisis” the world might be shook by. Maybe the crisis is just – again – German plans of world dominance.